The Stuff Dreams Are Made Of

National Fall Signing Day 2024

Nov 15, 2024

As parents, we want nothing more than to see our kid(s) happy. It doesn’t matter what age they are, when they struggle, we struggle. We often times hear the cliche, “You are only as happy as your least happy child.”

And man, when they are in pain, stop the presses. Cold sweats, sleepless nights, and constant perseveration, particularly at 2am, kick in. Or maybe that’s just me.

Making the decision to have a child- it is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.

- Elisabeth Stone

Every week I hear from parents around the country who reach out for exactly this reason. They are in pain. Their child is suffering mostly mentally, but sometimes physically as well. And they don’t know how to fix it.

At this point, you may be asking, “I thought the title of this article was about dreaming, why are we going down this negative rabbit hole?” Because behind the smiles you may have seen posted ALL over social media yesterday, of happy parents and proud kids who reached the “pinnacle” of youth sports and were joyfully signing National Letters of Intent (NLI) to play in college next year, I can guarantee it wasn’t all rainbows and unicorns to get there. And there was more than a handful of parents who were letting out a collective sigh that they, not only their kid, but also THE parents, survived the youth sports gauntlet.

6%

The Numbers Behind the Dream. According to the National Collegiate Athletic Association (NCAA), approximately 8 million students participate in high school sports in the United States each year. Of these, only about 495,000, or roughly 6%, will go on to compete at NCAA schools. -NCAA, Aug 16, 2024

Several years ago, as I was researching for my book, Raising Empowered Athletes, and one of the Dad’s stories who I interviewed still resonates strongly with me today. Here is a short excerpt from the book with Doug’s story:

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Doug says has no regrets for how Raquel’s volleyball career turned out. Despite spending thousands of dollars on club fees, travel costs, and hotels for tournaments, private coaching, even hiring a college recruiting coach who helped Raquel get a “mix tape” together and blast it out to over a hundred DI schools, he believes it was all worth it. That being said—and with hindsight being 20/20, now that he’s on the other side of his daughter’s quest to get a college scholarship—he’s got some wisdom to share with parents about the process. “What gets lost in [the youth sports process] is the kid themselves. No one stops to ask them what they want,” he said.

“I was the dad who, when Raquel was in eighth grade, was all in. I was worried about which club level volleyball team she was on. I thought it was so important that she played on the1’s team. She started on the 3’s team and worked her way up. By the time she was a sophomore, she’d made the top team and all of the parents on that team, me included, were chasing scholarships. Looking back now, it isn’t what I expected it was going to be,” he quietly reflected.

************************************** Many parents I speak with are very realistic, “Look, we don’t have dreams of our kid playing in college, we just think it would be great if they could make the high school team. We believe it would teach them great life lessons and frankly, keep them out of trouble.” I one hundred percent agree with this approach and logic.

If, on the other hand, you are raising a very driven kid, who also happens to have the physical attributes needed to succeed at their sport AND is curious enough to do the work, face the headwinds and be willing to perhaps, delay gratification, then this path might be for you.

Clients are often times parents who get feedback from coaches that their child has two of the three elements to be successful at their level: perhaps it’s size and athleticism but some times they lack either confidence or mindset (or both) to push through obstacles (both real and imagined). Oh, and we need to remember to sprinkle in a little luck as well. They need to stay healthy and maintain good grades along the way. Phew! That’s a lot and some aren’t even teenagers yet.

It warrants being repeated again. 495,000 or less that 7% will go on to play at the next level. Is your kid one of them? I love helping parents get the tools they crave to not only survive but thrive while running this gauntlet. Because the ball stops bouncing for us all at some point, but parents want their kids to be equipped for life with skills that will make them gritty, resilient and mentally strong.

Congratulations to all who have signed! It is a huge accomplishment. And they are just getting started.

We’ve kicked off our Fall parenting class series.

Join now!

There is still time to join the remaining three classes. Details below.

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Is the pressure of youth sports turning into more stress than joy for you and your child? You're not alone, and there’s a way to turn that stress into success—for both of you.

Introducing our exclusive four-week course (with a special bonus!)

From Stressed to Success: The Ultimate Guide for Sports Parents

The program designed specifically for parents who want help navigating the challenges in creating a supportive environment and helping their child thrive in the competitive world of youth sports.

"As a parent, coach and former collegiate athlete, Kirsten Jones knowledge and experience helps parent navigate the world of youth sports. She provides parents with the opportunity for growth in their understanding in how to be more present, which leads to being a better sports parent. “

-Father of 2 NCAA D1 Athletes

TOPICS WE GO DEEP INTO: (3 weeks left)

November 18: Understanding & Appreciating Team/Coach Dynamics

November 25: Recruiting 101

December 2: Bonus Episode to tie it all together!

ONE CLASS SIGN UP $50

FULL COURSE SIGN UP (includes the first 2 replays)

Learn the parenting tools that help you and your athlete sleep better tonight

🎙️ What: From Stressed to Success: The Ultimate Guide for Sports Parents

📍 Where: via ZOOM

📅 When: Mondays @ 6 PM PT / 9 PM ET (November 18th, 25th and Dec 2nd)