Which road will you take?
At some point, your athletic journey will pivot, having played sports will aid you in moments like this....
I love working with student athletes to help them find their groove on and off the court, pitch or pool. I often get asked by parents and athletes for help with a specific issue their kid is dealing with in that moment. And while it’s important to get the tools which are helpful in navigating the daily path, it’s often helpful when we are able to “zoom out” and see the full picture to know that it’s really the long game that matters.
Matt McGonigle, was a 4-time captain of DI College of Holy Cross, Men’s Soccer and after he graduated in December, he reached out to me, said he loves our mission and asked how he could help us grow.
Among other things, Matt has joined our team (yeah!) to share from his perspective as a 23-year-old (former) DI athlete trying to find out what’s next. He will address themes like grit, resilience, and leadership and we hope you enjoy him as much as we do at Team KJ!
Last year, we started a series last year on the #RaisingAthletes podcast, “Talking to the Student Athlete” to hear directly from the athletes themselves. We thought it would be enlightening to hear from those who are leading collegiately now. These episodes are some of our most listened episodes!
Fulfillment
by Matt McGonigle
Four months ago, I completed my last college soccer game. Four weeks on from that, I graduated college. The structure of school and athletics created the comfort of structure and challenge for four and half years and then spit me out into the real world, gifted with skills and habits that will help me thrive for the rest of my life.
With that being said, the one thing that school and athletics did not prepare me for was where to look for satisfaction in my life. While in school and athletics, I knew exactly where to look for satisfaction. Semester was twelve weeks long, the season was three months long, the spring season was four months long, and the summer season was three weeks long.
I knew exactly what a “productive day” looked like because I was in the structure of soccer and school for so long. Within that structure lies a feedback loop where you know if you are on track or not. If you did not have a good day of training, you knew right away because you had a coach and teammates holding standards to meet. Schooling is a constant feedback loop of pass, fail, and grades to tell you where you fall. Now with all of that in the rearview mirror, there is no one to tell me to show up at 6am, or lift these weights, or get to bed early tonight to be ready to play a big game tomorrow. Without the confines and comforts of structure it is easy to feel lost.
Now that I have found myself in the big, bad, real world, there aren’t as many external factors to tell me how I’m doing on a day-to-day basis. The internal motivation has had to be turned up even higher and every day has to be greeted as another challenge to better myself and assess whether or not I gave my best today. There is a lot more freedom in that, being able to define what success looks like to me. But it can also be a little daunting if you take the time to think about it too long.
Though coming up with your own definition of success off the pitch is not easy, I hope that entering the unstructured world of post-athletics life will unfold over time as I work to navigate this uncharted path. I wish I had an answer for how to fill that hole, but I am figuring it out as I go.
I find that helping people never seems to fail me in making me feel a sense of fulfillment. There's joy in knowing that this part of the process and the process itself is a fun, creative, design-your-adventure opportunity! Figuring things out is a whole new challenge I have not had…maybe ever. By no means am I the first person to experience this feeling and if you can manage to get out of your 20’s without feeling this way then you know a secret I do not.
If you have questions about my college sports journey, please feel free to email me! matt@kirstenjonesinc.com
I loved this essay from Matt. As in the epic Robert Frost poem, the road will split and we must make a choice. Which path will you take when the road divides? The one less traveled by?
Need a visualization exercise? This is one of my favorites! I love working with kids and parents to find their best selves.
Upcoming Events in 2024:
Visualization Workshop via ZOOM, 4/1/24 (DETAILS ANNOUNCED THIS WEEK!!!) **Exclusive signups for subscribers**
Partnership for Awareness (PFA), 4/3/24, San Marino, CA
#RaisingAthletes 100th Episode, 4/8/24
Multnomah Athletic Club (MAC), 4/18/24, Portland, OR
KPAX Sports Awards, 5/15/24, Missoula, MT
Living Spaces Women4Women Event, 6/5/24, via ZOOM
Glenbard Parent Series, 8/1/24, Chicago, IL via ZOOM
Nazareth Academy, 10/15/24, La Grange Park, IL via ZOOM
Let’s do this!
Xxx Kir
P.S. You’re amazing. We should talk!